Desperate Cupcakes gives Desperate Housewives a new twist

These hilarious but also a little crazy items come from Amazon.com. They’re the covers for Desperate Cupcakes and Desperate Cupcakes note cards , both by Anita Dyette, published by Clarkson Potter. The book is an 80-page hardcover humor book, out in November (the cards will be out in January) and the publisher says: The private lives of cupcakes—exposed! Sure, cupcakes are all sweet when they’re all dolled up for birthday parties, but what happens when the wrapper comes off? This deliciously funny book gives you a behind-the-scenes look at the wild and tawdry lives of Desperate Cupcakes. You’ll meet insecure cupcakes like Sally, who wraps herself in bacon to bring the sizzle back into her relationship. Follow these cupcakes to the dark side as they experience sugar rushes and crashes, succumb to snack attacks, and engage in ill-advised activities (like riding with the Hells Angle Cakes.) You’ll delve into their fears, their woes, and their fierce suspicion of muffins. Ultimately, you’ll discover how truly difficult it is to be everyone’s favorite dessert.

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Tags: anita-dyette, cards, cupcakes, deliciously, hells, meet-insecure, result, wrapper

Cook the Book: Lobster Rolls

From Recipes [Photograph: Caroline Russock] There’s something about the high-low combination of the Lobster Roll that has always appealed to me. Lobster, a classically decadent and pricey ingredient is served in a lowly hot dog bun, garnished with nothing more than some mayonnaise and butter. It’s also a fiercely regional sandwich, with New England written all over it. There’s the abundance of lobster paired with the uniquely New England top-sliced hot dog buns. But truth be told, for as much as I’ve enjoyed the idea of lobster rolls, I’ve never experienced one for myself. Thumbing through the pages of Edible: A Celebration of Local Foods by Tracey Ryder and Carole Topalian, I came across a recipe for lobster rolls adapted from Edible Cape Cod . I decided that since a trip up to New England wasn’t in the cards, a homemade version was in order. My lobster rolls weren’t exactly authentic, with no top-sliced buns to be found and lobsters from Chinatown, but they were undoubtedly delicious. The giant chunks of boiled lobster mixed with a homemade mayonnaise served on buttered and toasted rolls was rich beyond belief, and borderline too much to handle but a few drops of hot sauce mixed into the mayo cut right through the intense creaminess. …

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Tags: beaches, Boiled, cards, chinatown, cooking, dog, hot, lobsters, mustard, result, ryder, summer, tracey-ryder

Ooodles of cupcake merch at Exit 9

I buy an awful lot of gifts at Exit 9 . Greeting cards, too. I was shopping at the tiny East Village store this week for a friend’s birthday when I noticed that I was surrounded by cupcake merch. Cupcake socks. Key caps. Bake and serve cupcake molds that look like tea cups, with saucers. Four of each to a box for, I think, $20. Adorable. Fred for the win. Cupcake floss. Cupcake cards. Puffy cupcake stickers. Cupcake pins. Cupcake earrings. Can you feel the love?

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Tags: cards, cupcake-merch, exit, flickr, floss, love, molds, result, shopping, socks, tea, week

Steak with Burgundy Mushroom Sauce

I am in love with heavy, ingredient-rich steak sauces. Marlboro Man, on the other hand, believes a good steak should stand on its own. We’ll be seeking outside help for this fundamental life disagreement, but for today, I wanted to show you how to make this quick and easy mushroom sauce for whatever steak you feel like cooking tonight. A sirloin will work, or a skirt steak…or a fillet or a ribeye or anything else you might have languishing in your fridge. Whatever steak you decide to use, just know that the sauce will make it better. Just ask Marlboro Man. He’ll tell you. NOT.

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Tags: cards, children, cooking, easy-mushroom, fridge, green, like-cooking, make-it-better, pioneer, pioneer woman, sauce, stand-on-its, steak, white-mushrooms

Three of My Favorite Things

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Tags: cards, definition, eyewitness, flickr, internet, online, opinion, Simply Delicious, trademark

Spaghetti & Meatballs

I love—I mean love—making spaghetti and meatballs. Oh, don’t get me wrong—I love eating it, too. But if I had to choose forever between cooking it and eating it…well, wait a minute. I don’t know which I’d choose. Never eating spaghetti and meatballs again in my life would be pretty devasted. What I’m trying to say in a roundabout, backward, incoherent, motormouthed way is that I derive a great deal of satisfaction from cooking spaghetti and meatballs. There’s just something about the mixing of the meatballs, the forming them into compact little rounds, the browning them in the same pot in which you’ll eventually add the sauce ingredients, the adding of the meatballs to the sauce. The steady simmer, during which the meatballs impart their flavor to the sauce. The pretending to be Italian Catholic. The wishing my name was Costanza. I have a rich fantasy life. If you saw my coloring, you’d see what I mean.

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Tags: between-cooking, browning, cards, eventually-add, freshly-ground, italian, life, pioneer, sauce, spaghetti, the-meatballs

Valentine’s Day!

I decided a few of weeks ago, that I wanted to try to make some cookies using vintage Valentine cards as the theme. They are so sweet and the artwork is just darling. I’ve seen cookies and cakes with artwork printed on them online and in bakeries, but I didn’t realize this was something I could achieve at home. After doing a little research, I found out you can buy frosting sheets and edible ink cartridges for certain home printers. And mine was one of them. YAY! So I bought the inks for my printer. Then I realized I would have to clean it somehow, which sounded like a whole bunch of trouble, so I decided to buy another printer just like it. No such luck. My printer is too old for stores to still carry. So, I had to get a newer printer, which meant I needed different inks … of course. But I was determined, so I went ahead and exchanged the inks while I waited for the new printer to arrive. After it arrived and I started to set it up, I thought something was strange. It called for six cartridges, but the edible inks …

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Homemade Glazed Doughnuts

Let me begin this post by saying how excited I am to share this doughnut recipe with you. What can I say? Doughnuts are exciting. They thrill me to the bone. Second, let me lay one thing out on the table: Making good, raised doughnuts at home is not as easy as you’d think . For years (yes, you heard me) I tried in vain to make the perfect homemade doughnut—not just a fat, bready wad of fried dough with a sweet glaze, but a delicate, light ring of love with a slightly crispy surface and a wonderful flavor. Like “those doughtnuts”, and I don’t mean Krispy Kreme. I mean the doughnuts sold at the tiny doughnut dive in our small town. They’re the best raised doughnuts in the world. The shop is owned by an older resident of our town whose temperament can range from kind, welcoming, and gracious to a complete mirror of a certain soup purveyor in a certain long-running series starring a certain man with the last name of Seinfeld. Think I’m kidding? The doughnut guy in our town once made my summer babysitter…

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Tags: babies, cards, cooking, doughnuts, instructions, internet, kitchen, life, pioneer woman, summer, time, Town, weather

Dulce de Leche Coffee

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Simple, Hearty White Chili

I love white chili. And just like regular chili, there are as many incarnations as there are grains of sand in all the beaches of the world. Some white chili is soupy and creamy, with chunks of chickens and beans. Some white chili is vegetarian, without an ounce of chicken in sight. Other white chili, like the one I make, is more of a bean-centered delight—simple, warm, hearty, and filling, with plenty of flavor to spare. But here’s what I do. I make “simple, hearty white chili.” Then I proceed to doctor the simple, hearty white chili with about a thousand different garnishes, and the “simple” pretty much goes out the window. I just love garnishing things! It allows me to believe that I’m being simple and minimalist…while not actually being simple and minimalist. It’s perfect for people in denial!

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